Diary of A Mainland Girl

Dear Diary, today there is nothing to tell you, nothing. Let me tell you what I'm thinking right now. I'm thinking of how happy I am, how happy I have been throughout this month of September. Happiness doesn't come easy for me, I struggle to find it, very simple, yet, complicated.... I've had a lot of miracles the universe blessed me with this month, with God allowing them to happen of course. You know, when I hear these blind people who think they know all about God and his ways talk, I laugh, and i wonder if they have any sense at all. How can you believe in God and not believe in his universe?? I recall a day, a normal day when I was sitting near one "oh so religious, righteous and I'm definitely going to heaven" person. A lady passed and was wearing what some consider "indecent". This "righteous" person literally condemned and passed all judgement upon the other lady. Reason? Outfit. I shook my head and wondered where in the Bible...

Dear Diary, I woke up happy, but it wasn't at my house, wasn't on my familiar bed either. The night before, I had met with some friends and it was a good evening. An evening of laughter, playfulness and more laughter. The friends are guys and I really like being around them, I'm a very guarded person when I'm around most people, by this I mean I still reserve a big part of me, I only show them the surface (which is nothing really), but these friends are one of the few males (heck even females) I lose all inhibitions with. I expose my "wild running child" and it amazes me how I'm able to just BE. When I left that house, I went straight to my "top on the list" male best friend's house. The night prior, while I was with the male buds I just told you about, I pinged him to talk about a music meeting he planned...WITHOUT ME. I accidentally found out, as I do mostly.I let him know I was upset about being left out, I mean come on!! I'm suppose...

Dear Diary, kedu? For once in my life lemme have small respect and greet you first. Odi kwa nma? Good! Now to my gossip.... Today I didn't attend mass. Reason, it rained (half truth), I was tired jor! No, not tired of God my father, I was bodily tired. There I was, lying down doing absolutely nada.                                  The Queen of Hearts. About the photo above shey? I was lazying about, doing nothing, then, Damilare's ping came in. He made a funny remark about being careful when dealing with Yoruba boys (had to do with my display picture at that moment), AKA Yoruba Demons. Diary, isn't that laughable? From his name "Damilare", you can see that he is a Yoruba boy abi? Short story shorter, he asked what I was doing later in the evening and I said; "nothing", I told him I knew a good fish place and we fixed a dinner hang out, no, that to me wasn't a date. He made me laugh so much, I could...

Dear Diary, today was the last Saturday of this very beautiful month. Here in Lagos Nigeria, we do something called "environmental sanitation" every last Saturday mornings. You know I host a radio show yeah? Ehen, good. Alarm went off at 5am, I didn't dilly dally today, it was a 'straight to the point' morning for me. I got ready and left the house by 6am. I waited for more than 10 minutes for a bus. While I was waiting, a woman (she looked to be in her late 30's/early 40's, I'm not sure) with 4 children (they looked between the ages of 5-11), quietly tapped me and I removed one of my ear pieces. She spoke Yoruba, "e jor aunty, e fun mi ni owo motor". I looked at her for some seconds and I could tell she was lying, she wasn't going anywhere. I asked her in English "where are you going?". Diary trust me I was devoid of any accent. I spoke clear Nigerian English. She didn't understand what I said so I looked at her oldest chil...

Dear Diary, today was a bit somehow, no, not a bad day, just somehow. Gloria left for Aba today. I had to wake up by 5 with her. She wanted pap so I went to the kitchen to make it for her, I wouldn't do that for anybody at 5 fucking am but Gloria deserved it, plus she was leaving my family today. Barrister Igwe (our neighbor) assisted in dropping her off, I glanced at the mirror to make sure I looked presentable (I didn't bother washing my face or even brushing, I brush before I go to bed so I could pretty much pull that off). I pulled her luggage (you know how those luggages are naw, the ones with the tires and shii) behind me and got into the car with it. Yo I was tired, I was like a robot just walking on command. I plugged in my earpiece and reduced the volume, selected the right kind of music for my mood and leaned my head against the door. I was half asleep, half awake. Barrister Igwe turned on his radio and I groaned in protest. I'm very sure he didn't hear me any...

Dear Diary, today I took the results to the Doctor for analysis. He looked at them carefully and gave me answers, answers which I'm not satisfied with. Earlier, (before I got to that hospital), I had seen shege first. It had rained a little and you know how it is here in Lagos Nigeria whenever it rains. Traffic from hell shows up, transportation becomes double the original fare, heck, buses even become scarce! I will never know why this happens, ever. Let's not even talk about how I suffered, talking about it will get me upset so,, NO. On my way back, I felt so weak, my energy level was so low I almost fell. I couldn't wait to get home. I FUCKING NEED A CAR!! DO SOMETHING!!!!!! It's not fair that some other people get cars as gifts and I don't. Really NOT fair. Don't gimme that "life's not fair,, bla bla" horseshit! My landlord has 3 fucking cars, he can only drive one at a time (because not alien abi?) Ehen, so since he is only human after all s...

Dear Diary, today I woke up fabulous. Happy, etc. Nothing extraordinary happened during the day. I had a lot of fun this evening/night. Good energies flowed around my BBM. I laughed and had fun. I also bantered with Kelechi Nwaike over gender roles, I stood firmly on my point of view regarding sex and gender. If a man calls a woman a 'slut' because she has sex just as freely as he does, he too is a 'slut'. Period. Nobody can tell me nonsense. Kelechi is a young man I respect so this is no diss, I think he is brilliant too. The only problems we have is when it comes to Sex and Gender roles, other than that, we are good. Goodnight Diary, I'll visit you tomorrow. Xoxo.                This was beautiful for me                    

Dear Diary, I'm writing this part almost immediately, I decided not to wait, the rest I will wait, but this is urgent for me. I woke up feeling heavy hearted, I'm not sure why. My heart started singing Jasmine Thomson's "do it now" so I opened one eye and grabbed my phone, plugged my ear piece in my ears and searched my playlist for that song. I needed to cry, the old me wasn't a girl who cried, she was a girl who took it all in until her heart ached, she saw crying as a sign of weakness and she was not a weak girl. The new me knows better, she knows that crying is strength and not weakness, it does afterall take a strong person to express emotion. Next I played Jasmine's "adore you" and I allowed my self cry, I backed Gloria and quietly cried, she didn't know. I cried with my eyes closed and the music played on. May heaven bless Bianca Bella for being the one to introduce me to Jasmine Thomson's music. My sister came in from the bathroo...

Dear Diary, i managed to wake up by 6;45am today, I felt so weak and my energy level was low, dangerously low. I clutched my sides and went to the kitchen to boil some hot water, cold got trapped inside me again. The Landlord didn't pump water and I was miffed, (my sister wanted to draw his blood). I laughed at the mini me's anger, I swear that girl is my sister...when she isn't being an idiot that is. Gloria was the first to bath, me? I was still dragging my feet and groaning. Okay I managed to bath and get ready, the car was waiting (I think I made us late..I'm not sure). Church was lit! Yes we arrived late but I like the attention, I like that people stare at me. Father Thaddeus our dear parish priest was presiding for this mass. We were late so we had to stand outside for the homily to be over. People were staring at my face, my anklet at my left foot, and when I spoke, their necks nearly snapped as they were trying to see who spoke, (I have this effect on people...

Dear Diary, the alarm I set for 6;30AM went off, the tone? Bad Girls by Mia. I love that song, it does something to my mind and I get a rush of adrenaline. I stood up, went to the other side of the bed and turned off the alarm, I didn't wanna wake The Lady Vivian. I quietly went to the bathroom and did all I needed to do there, wore my clothes and proceeded to do a little bit of makeup, the lightening was poor so I had to be careful. She woke soon enough and we said our greetings, we laughed a bit at some of the events of the party. I checked my phone for time and discovered I was gonna be late if I didn't do something fast! Uber!! The driver's registered number was turned off, my registered number was also turned off but I knew he was trying to call me as I was too (using my other phone). I started saying a prayer and soon, I reached him. Short story shorter, he came and I said goodbye to Vivian and left. I arrived at the studio on time (hallelujah!) Great show it was, ...

Dear Diary, we all woke up early today, 6;45am is very early in my books. I said my prayers, picked up my phones (one before the other), read the messages and responded to the ones I deemed worthy of my response (I don't allow negative energy anywhere near me, my soul doesn't like it so I protect her from negative vibes). I had people to see today and limited time to see them so I started running around, first, I steamed my face (sebum was killing me with oils), then I bathed. My baby sister (Ogechi Assumpta Valerie), wanted to go out and she wanted to borrow one of my outfits (I dunno why she does this, she has new clothes o!). Anyways, I gave her permission and she wore it, it's a short dress that I never wear with any pants underneath, by "pants" I mean "trousers, leggings.." She wears pants under her short outfits, but today, she didn't wanna wear any and I was a bit upset (worried). "Are you gonna wear that like that?" I had asked, ...

Dear Diary, I woke up early and very positive. I went to my closet and fished out the dirty laundry I've had since like 3 weeks (or more). Settled down to washing, but not before I prayed to God for strength. I really HATE laundry. Finished washing and moved on to washing the bathroom. I was active in the other other group (my new fave, I've got 4 currently), "Getaway" it's called. It was a fun morning with them today and I enjoyed the banter. The females are very beautiful and real, I love that about them. The rain fell for a bit and I was irked by that, I mean come on!! I just washed!! Soon enough it stopped and I set out to buy "Brazilian wool" for my hair. I like that wool because it doesn't break my hair or hurt my scalp. My "hair dresser" told me her price and I gave her mine (economy, as everyone says nowadays) *shrugs*. I sat down and she got to making my hair, I find it hard to sit for more than an hour and soon enough, my bum b...

Dear Diary, today I woke up to some pretty annoying messages. I refused to address most of them even at the risk of being viewed as a horrible human (this has always been my problem since high school). But lemme tell you one thing Diary, I don't really care, I'm very "Zen" like that, it's how I'm programmed to function (more like how I programmed myself). Today was my CT Scan day and I was very, very, very NERVOUS! So you now see why I couldn't be bothered with all that crap? Good. I did my makeup as best as I could manage, all things given, grabbed my "money purse" and put it in the bag I chose for today. I have become very conscious of my "money purse" and making sure there's actually money inside,  (because one day I forgot to put money in it and got stranded...well almost). Back to today, as I was about leaving, my good friend and neighbor Olabisi held my hand and said a prayer for me, I inhaled and sucked in the positive ene...

Dear Diary, first of, I wanna apologize for taking this long to set you up. I should have done it since the first of January, but I suppose I wasn't exactly ready at that time. A proper introduction between us, you and I. Hi diary, I'm Uzoamaka (never mind the rest of the names), but you may refer to me as Amy, everyone does, (okay about 70% of people do so yeah, "Amy" does it). Dairy? Please keep in mind that the "Amy" is pronounced as "aemie" okay? Yes, good. I haven't decided what to call you....yet, but I will, oh I will. I imagine what you look like and I think you are blue, a pale beautiful, blue colour. Me? I'm dark skinned, a shade of brown more precisely, I'm only 5'2, a little busty, some sizable hips and err, a little bit of butt. I love all things blue (I think everything is beautiful in blue and I have no clue why). I also love the colour black, I think it represents power, strength....  I do not promise to...